Hero

Hero In this beautiful epic, Jet Li plays a swordsman called No Name (it sounds cooler in Chinese). He is quiet and can kill a man silly fast with his sword or wallet, pretty much anything. He doesn’t talk much and when he does it’s in Chinese. I didn’t understand a word since I skipped that class (along with Math and other important classes that would have helped me graduate with some level of confidence instead of graduating by my bottom hair). They were nice enough to provide subtitles, however. Hero is easily the 3rd best movie I’ve ever read (luckily, Matt was there to help me with the big words). The 1st would have to go to Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon followed closely by the 2nd best movie I ever read, The Passion of the Christ. Speaking of Crouching Tiger, Hero was a little too familiar. I understand that Chinese myth may have some similar themes, but come on. I heard this movie was produced by Quentin Tarantino. I kept waiting for Chow Yun Fat to show up with the Green Destiny sword saying “Surprise! I’m not dead, mofo’s! Somebody killed MY master and they gonna PAAAAY! You know what they call Shrimp Fried Rice in France, beeeoch!?!” With Tarantino involved, I was a little nervous, but I’m happy to report that no ears get cut off and there was no sign of a gimp, thank Buddah.