King Kong

That's one huge gorilla.Sometimes my life rules. Not so much in the beginning, what with the drunk, violent parents and their hankering for smack, but later on in life. Like on Monday night, for instance, when I got to see Peter Jackson‘s KING KONG a week before it’s released!!! That’s right, me (in a huge theater full of press) and the great ape with a little get together before he crushes theaters this Kwanzaa!
We met up with Stephanie from, future publicist, Carol Marshall PR. It was a bit nerve wracking at first when my movie buddy, Roger, didn’t find his name on “the list”. But a phone call to the right exec, and we were in like Regis Philbin. After checking the cell phones and going through the Israeli security check point, there it was welcoming us in… The table of free JUMBO POPCORN AND GINORMOUS COKE!!! You may recall my near emergency at the Jarhead screening involving a large coke and my almost soaking my jockeys and socks. Well, I made it through 3 hours of King Kong without incident. Super bladder.
There have been some who claim that the 3 hour playing time is too long. Whoever said that has a pathological over-estimation of the value of his own time. Or a tiny bladder. And you know what they say about guys with tiny bladders… The same guy probably spent a good 37 minutes trying to perfect his combover. That’s a mathematical impossibility, by the way. It cannot be. Just like when someone asks where to get “good Indian food”. The answer is “Nowhere, sir. Now, would you move your bad combover, I’m trying to watch the last 37 minutes of King Kong.”
For those of you that watch Mtv’s Laguna Beach religiously, King Kong was a movie released March 2, 1933. Oh, and 1933 was a year from, like, the calendar a long, long time ago. Not as old as dinosaurs though. Speaking of dinosaurs, there are dinosaurs-a-plenty in PJ’s King Kong! Imagine if you put Jurassic Park 1 thru 4 in de coconut and shake it all up. You’d be getting close to the prehistoric parade that is PJ’s King Kong. Yes, I know there isn’t a Jurassic Park 4 yet. But there will be. And it won’t compare. Oh, Laguna Beach side bar, I think L.C. should totally ditch Stephen. Every time he comes back to town he is such a tease. Who needs the mind games?
When the original King Kong came out it was a huge deal. Why? Well, the hot ticket prior to Kong was the Lone Ranger… on the radio. I’m not saying that this Kong film makes THAT much of a leap, but it does raise the proverbial filmmaking bar.
Now is the part of my write up where I use every Kong/ape pun I can think of while I gush over the living proof that God loves geeks: Peter Jackson.
Peter Jackson’s King Kong is Kong-tastic!! Apert and Rope-ape give Kong 4 opposable thumbs up! Way up! A KONG sized adventure! Did somebody say multiple Ape-cademy Awards!?!
I did NOT hate this movie, my people! I need to see it again. There is so much to take in. I actually got dizzy watching Kong on the Empire State building. Naomi Watts is incredible as Ann Darrow and she really is the emotional heart of the film. The CGI Kong is pretty breathtaking. That computerized ape can act!
Big thanks to Roger for the fun trip! You can check out his review over at The Independent ( starting Friday, Dec 9.